BLIMEY, THE HORROR, THE HORROR!

One more go-around on the Hollywood Hostages because this stuff, you just can't make it up.

Pictured above is the Bishop who's the chaplain for Britain's armed forces. Seriously: Let us pray. (See second item)

Meanwhile, meet Arthur Batchelor, 20, one of the hostages who caved in so readily to Iranian terrorists before the Brits were sent home with their goody bags. In an interview in today's Daily Mirror, Seaman Batchelor described the horror he and his merry crew went through even after they compliantly did everything the terrorists told them to:

"Seaman Arthur Batchelor was singled out for torment after his captors learned he was a navigator - and mistakenly thought that meant he was in charge of his boat.

"The guards, who taunted him for his youth and called him Mr Bean after the bungling comic character, put him in plastic handcuffs and blindfolded him - then slapped him around.

"He said: 'It was beyond terrifying. They seemed to take particular pleasure in mocking me for being young. ... A guard kept flicking my neck with his index finger and thumb. I thought the worst. We've all seen the videos.'

"He added: 'I was frozen in terror and just stared into the darkness of my blindfold, I could feel the emotion welling up inside me. But I wasn't going to let them see me cry.' Once back in his cell, the emotion finally came flooding out. Arthur said: 'To be honest I cried and cried like a baby.

"'I ended up falling asleep on my cell floor. I think I blacked out. That night I slept like a log as I was exhausted from the pressure and emotionally drained and sapped of energy.'"

And as if Arthur's hideous ordeal of being taunted for his youth, being called Mr. Bean for his goofiness, and having his neck flicked with a finger weren't enough, get a load of who's being heard from now, in an inadvertent explanation of why only about 3 percent of Britons attend church. From today's Telegraph:

"The Roman Catholic bishop who oversees the armed forces has provoked fury by praising the Iranian leadership for its "forgiveness" and "act of mercy" in freeing the 15 British sailors and marines last week.

	Bishop Burns said Iran demonstrated 'faith in a forgiving God'

"The Bishop of the Forces, the Rt Rev Tom Burns, said that the religious beliefs of the Iranians had played a large part in their decision to release the hostages after holding them for more than two weeks.

"His words were echoed by a leading Anglican figure, the Right Rev Michael Nazir-Ali, the Bishop of Rochester, who said Iran had acted within the "moral and spiritual tradition of their country" and contrasted this with Britain's "`free-floating attitudes''".

--All ashore that's goin' ashore.