Monday, March 10, 2008

Mr. Spitzer Goes to Washington

[Top: Client 9, with his Patriotic Flag Pin and his "Ain't-enough-Xanax-in-the-world-to-get-me-through-this-day" poor spouse, cruelly placed on display]

[Bottom: The Scene of the Crime]

Oh man, does the New York Times have a corker of an exclusive today.

Whoo-eee -- and this one just gets worse, for "Client 9" and others. We are now re-entering Theater of the Absurd-land in New York politics ... which has disgraced itself. Again! (To quote Yeats in another context.)

I remember that the former New York Governor Nelson Rockefeller, who inconveniently croaked while IN THE ACT of having sex with a woman other than his wife, though he was not paying cash, per se. I don't think Nelson actually ever paid cash. And, of course, he wasn't on the taxpayer payroll at the time.

Whatever: The next in line to become governor of New York, after "Client 9" quits, is the lieutenant governor, who is legally blind (ok there -- who needs to see what is going on in Albany? Trust me, I've spent time there. And the new guy will undoubtedly have more vision that his predecessor (s) . Next in line after him: State Senator Joe Bruno, who is under investigation by the F.B.I. on unrelated matters.

[Update March 14 -- On the other hand, maybe I'm too rash in crediting the new governor with the potential for vision, Albany being Albany. See Paterson's amazing response to a discrimination lawsuit cited in this little beauty from the Daily News.]

You really, truly cannot make any of this stuff up.

Myself, I want to see "Client 9" Spitzer's expense accounts for those business trips to Washington.

A while ago, the crooked Louisiana Governor Edwin Edwards said the only way he could lose an election was "if they found me in bed with a dead girl or a live boy."

New York ain't Louisiana, and I don't even think Louisiana is Louisiana anymore.

Spitzer is talking the usual pious palaver about redemption and --gag me now --- failing to meet his personal high standards. I'm sure some staff flunky, and more than a few of the usual therapy-whores in the media, are desperately thumbing through their D.S.M. IV (r)'s looking for excuses.

Meanwhile, Spitzer disgraced himself further by dragging out his unfortunate (though very rich) wife as a prop to stand beside him -- very much as that ass-hat former governor of New Jersey, McGreevey, did to his own wife when he got caught in a gay sex-extortion scandal.

Can a man possibly insult his wife any more than that? What sort of a man would even ask? I mean, how does that conversation even begin?

Spitzer says he is not resigning, of course. I give the bum maybe a day because like all chiselers he's hoping for a lucky break.

And Client 9: Why don't you lose the lapel flag-pin display? Nobody's saluting, Skippy.

By the way, what kind of an anxious day do you suppose Clients 1 through 8, and 10 through whatever, are having?


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